Mountain and Valley Thoughts

I hope that all of you had a wonderful Christmas and New Year, filled with a deep sense of awe and wonder at God's love for us and plan for the ages, and a deep security in His love and presence. December went, for us, way to fast. For me the Thanksgiving and Christmas season is my favorite of the year, but every year it seems to speed up and fly past faster than the last. And yet, when I look back and ask myself what about it I shouldn't have done, should have changed, etc., I can't see that there is any part of it I should have skipped. (A little secret, just between us . . . I am going to watch a bunch of Christmas movies this week and listen to a bunch of Christmas music to catch up what I missed and to try and immerse myself in the wonder of God's gift now that the flurry of celebrating it has passed. But, don't tell anyone!)

Mary Ann and I got back down "off the mountain" this Sunday night, returning from Hume Lake Christian Camp with 24 high schoolers and 4 other adults. It was a really incredible weekend, but we were sure tired. I wanted to share two things about it that might bless you—one from the mountain top, and one from after we were home.

On the Mountain: While up there I reflected on the number of youth (and counselors) we've taken there (or to other similar types of events of concentrated God time). This was our 19th winter taking kids to Hume, and I think for me somewhere around trip number 33 or 34 with kids to Hume, plus I don't know how many times as a family or to other events there. I was struck in my reflecting by one of those moments when things were very clear in their simplicity.

As I reflected on the chapel times there, and on countless similar times counseling people as a pastor, chaplain for the fire department, etc., that there is an irony in that we "get" that being good at anything takes work, and yet we seem so surprised when we invest nothing in our relationship with God and after a year wonder why we aren't closer to Him. As I looked at the youth, and thought back over the past, I saw how many of them are so diligent and make so many sacrifices for sports, grades, 4H, etc., and wouldn't expect to excel in any of them without personal discipline and sacrifice . . . and yet do little to nothing to grow in Christ and wonder why they feel so distant from Him and hear so little from Him, or fall so quickly back into old patterns. (This truth applies equally to adults.)

So, the last morning, I shared that with them and I am hoping it resonated. I told them that they understand that growing in something takes work—they demonstrate this understanding in many things they apply themselves to—and that their walk with God is no different. And I reflected . . . isn't it puzzling how such an obvious truth to us seems to so easily elude us in our Christian life. We somehow act as if simply acknowledging God will make us grow with Him and be stronger, and yet we'd laugh if someone said that simply saying they like football or school will make them a good football player or student. Anyway, it was just a thought—a moment of clarity—and I thought it might bless you or be something you could share with another in an example that would ring true with them.

Back Home: Then, this morning, an elderly gentleman who grew up in this area but now lives in town, read about our trip in the article I write for our community newsletter and called to thank us for our work with youth in these hills and valleys. I was sharing with him that we are taking 35 youth between this trip and the upcoming middle school one, and how crazy amazing that is considering how small our community and church is. We got talking about how, though, a lot of those youth don't stick after Hume, or grow, and how we have to trust that God's word was planted for later harvest, and that they know they were loved and cared for. As we talked it reminded me of a pivotal moment in my life when Mary Ann and I were very discouraged after a youth camp we put on and were talking to the pastor at the time (the man I took over pastoring for). He asked us a simple question—"Did you do what God asked you to do?"

After thinking about it we replied that we felt we had and he said, basically, "Then that is all God asked you to do. He is responsible for the results." It was one of the most freeing moments of our life as I realized that I am, indeed, only responsible for doing what He asks me to do. I have had this and similar revelations free me tremendously when, say, counseling a struggling marriage or an addiction—the problem is really God's to solve, it is not my problem. I am responsible for being obedient and usable, but ultimately it is His. This is a wonderful realization because the weight of the burdens around is too much to bear. It doesn't mean we don't care, we don't weep, we don't love—but we recognize that the results are God's to bring about, what He asks of us is to be obedient.

God bless all of you and, as always, thanks for sharing in my life!   —Erick

God's Plans

In March of 1997 Mary Ann and I went with another couple to Hume Lake Christian Camp in the Sierra Nevada Mountains of California. We were taking a couple of cars full of middle schoolers to winter camp . . . and I did not want to go! I wasn't a big fan of kids back then, and if I went in to a restaurant and there were a bunch of kids there I'd asked to be seated away from them. But, we were the logical couple to go with them when one of the couples who were supposed to couldn't. Mary Ann and I were the youngest people in the church, we didn't have kids, and we were self-employed. So, Mary Ann excited and me dragging my feet, we went. In the last chapel session there God overwhelmed my heart with a brief sense of the cumulative pain and tears ahead in the years to come for the 300 or so kids in the chapel. It deeply affected me and when we got home and an excited youth told his dad about his experience with God and his plans to read the Bible and the dad replied, "That will last about a week, get in the car," it broke my last wall and we decided to keep working with these youth. It was the working with youth in the next couple of years that made me the natural one to be asked to pastor the church when the pastor left, and in the years since then (January 2000) I have been both the senior pastor and the youth leader of our fellowship.

This weekend I sat in that same chapel with Mary Ann and with some other counselors and 16 of our high schoolers (among the 600+ people there) and reflected. This was my 25th trip there with youth, and as I looked back to that first trip I thought, "If you had told me, when I set out that first time, that I would be here at least 24 more times with youth (and multiple times as a family), let alone that I would be a pastor, I would have never believed it." In the years since then we have seen youth get married, have children, some walk with God, and some walk from God. As a pastor, youth leader, and volunteer fire fighter I have been there with them when a home of theirs has burned to the ground, when a sibling has committed suicide, when families have fallen apart, and when families have risen from the ashes and grown in to God-loving, strong units. I have done weddings, and funerals. I have confronted demons, seen the sick healed . . . and lost a lot of battles as well. I have felt the Holy Spirit moving strongly . . . and wondered just where He was. It has been an amazing journey, and certainly one I never, ever would have picked or designed or thought of for myself.

It all began when we said "yes" (even though I said it grudgingly). God's plans for us, each of us, are amazing. While they may never make headlines, or get on talk shows, they are miraculous and amazing simply in that the Creator of the universe partners with us and privileges us to walk out His plans and to colabor with Him as He works in and through us. It was truly stunning to sit there in that chapel and reflect back, and to see how different my life was from anything I would have ever planned, and how much more amazing it was than anything I would have ever planned. God is amazing, and God in us is incredible. I truly encourage you, if God is nudging you somewhere or to something, no matter how much it differs from your own plans, to trust Him and say, "yes." His plans for you will be far more fulfilling, meaningful, eternally valuable, and amazing than anything you can do by holding on to control of your life.

God bless you all. Thanks for sharing your life with me. —Erick

Because It Pleases Him . . . Is That Enough?

Once I was in a position where I spent many hours in a car just listening to the talk of those around me. They were people who I had been ministering to for some time (years in some cases), and who I was taking to a Christian event (I am being intentionally vague). As I listened to them I could reflect on the priorities of their hearts, as was reflected by what consumed their conversation and what seemed to excite them, and I found myself wondering, “Is there any hope? It seems like God is so little a part of their lives and conversation—and their interests—and the things that consume their time and energy and passion seem so removed from Him . . .” As I listened I got really down and began to wonder, “What is it all about? Am I doing any good?” It seemed that the world and its lures was so overwhelmingly dominate in their lives, and that God was just a spoke on their wheel instead of its hub . . . One who was rarely even mentioned.

Later at the event, in a worship setting, I was behind many of them, watching them and reflecting and my heart was sad. Then, it was as if God started taking me down the line, one by one. He started reminding me of a role I had played in each of their lives—a time in each of their lives I had stood with them through some tremendous pain they were going through personally, or because of choices in their families. They each seemed so confident now, and “all together,” but I knew that in each of their lives, at a private time, there had been pain, uncertainty, tears, and fear. There were some amazingly hard times I had been through in their lives with them . . . and the thing was, few of them knew anything about those times in the lives of the ones they were standing next to. I realized that, in a quiet way, Jesus had allowed me to be His hands and feet and words in most of their lives . . . and no one but Him, them, and Mary Ann would ever know. (Note: It wasn't just His voice I heard—the enemy was quick to remind me, as well, of all the times I fell short in people's lives, all the times I was selfish and didn't minister when I could have, and all the times I just blew it.)

As I reflected, I realized that, for most of those in front of me, I probably wouldn’t be there to see the moment when God broke through for them and became not just a belief and a theology, but the center of their lives. I had been privileged to play a small part in it—to stand with them, hold them, comfort them, and show them Him for a moment. But, for so many, when the pain had become a distant thing, the world had pulled them back toward it. Yet, I knew that I wasn’t responsible for their choices, but had been faithful when asked. It was then like He asked me (or, I asked myself?), “Is that enough?”

I don’t share any of this to lift me up—each and every one of you have been there for people and touched people’s lives in quiet, but powerful ways—I share this more as a point of reflection for us, because I think that we all face the same question(s) as we seek to serve God. As the Spirit prompted that question, “Is that enough?”, I had to answer it in my heart. I had to face the question and wonder, “Am I OK with no one knowing the half of what I do or have done, and with maybe not even having it appreciated over the long haul by those I ministered to?” Then came the second half, “Am I OK just being obedient and being a part of their journey—being a surrendered vessel which Jesus was able to fill and use in their life to show them a little bit of Him—even if it means I don’t get to share in the joy of their final turning to God in total surrender some day, or even if I never get the encouragement of knowing that they have given their lives to Him?”

It was then that the question became fully apparent to me, “Is it enough?” Is it enough that only God knows what I have done, and that He is pleased—or do I need to see results, do I need others to know, do I need to promote myself and defend myself? Is it enough to have Jesus smile and quietly whisper, “I know. Thank you.”. . . which, in the end, really means the question is, “Is He enough?” Is it enough for me to love and serve my Master, without the world ever thanking me, or without even ever knowing if it made a difference, and without ever being considered a great pastor, without my blog ever having a huge following, or without my ever having a name that is known outside its little boundaries?

Some time back at Hume Lake Christian Camp where I was with some youth, Moi was the band and a song of theirs, It Pleases You, caught fire over the weekend and became the essence of the weekend. The core of the song talks about yielding our life to Him and it has the chorus, “It may not make a difference, it may not change a single life, it may not move a single stone, but it pleases You, it pleases You, it pleases You, it pleases You, oh cause it pleases You, cause it pleases You, I come, I come, I come.”

Is it enough—because it pleases Him? Is He enough? Or do I need more. It is a question I have to reflect on not just once, but I have to return to repeatedly as the world seeks to draw me away as well.